Don’t forget to love yourself.

I just spent a good portion of my day watching Youtube videos of people giving expert advice as to how to get someone to be attracted to you. I was doing this because I wanted to find answers. Weeks ago, I met a guy that made my heart skip a beat. He was the person that I always said never existed: someone who could make me fall head over heels at the first meeting.

After pondering over these alien feelings, I realized that I had indeed fallen for this person who was essentially, still a stranger to me. I’ve barely skimmed the surface of what makes him a person and yet, he’s the only constant thought that I have every single day since that first encounter. I will even go as far as saying that I think I’m already in love with him.

How strange is it to feel this way about someone whom I barely know.

Continue reading “Don’t forget to love yourself.”

A letter to Amsterdam

I didn’t know what to expect when I stepped on to the plane heading towards you back in October. I cried millions of tears from the Immigration counter to my seat on the airplane because finally, I was starting the long journey I had been dreaming of. The sheer amount of blog posts, testimonials, youtube videos, and guide books that I had read could not prepare me for what was in my future, when you and I would finally come face to face. Honestly, I still cannot describe how I feel about you despite having been with you, in you, for about a month and a half already.

I will try to illustrate my thoughts in bullet form for the time being.

  1. Everyone was right about your temperament. In a single day alone, you would give me a bit of sunshine only to be followed by endless bouts of rain, scattered all throughout the day. I can’t tell when your tears will pour so I find myself staying in my waterproof boots and bright, yellow raincoat.
  2. You are kind. I lost my wallet about a week ago and somehow, it found its way back to me. If that had happened anywhere else, I knew I would have had to kiss Chewy goodbye.
  3. Nothing could have prepared me for the money situation. I was not previously informed that you promoted paperless transactions, so I was quite reliant on Anna ’til I was finally able to get a bank card of my own. This irked me for weeks even if I knew it would get better in the long run.
  4. You have so much to offer. I could get lost in the mazes of your museums for days, maybe even weeks. Don’t even get me started on the houses! The streets are generally quiet but nothing short of interesting. I could stare at you and never get bored.
  5. You are home now, but not really. I still feel like an outsider not because of the language barrier or my ethnicity. You are beautiful but a stopover, if that makes any sense. I was waiting for that feeling everyone talks about when you know you’ve found the one; that it’d be love at first sight and that I would settle here for the rest of my life. I honestly was hoping that from you, for us but sadly, it doesn’t appear to be so.

I hope you don’t mind these letters, Amsterdam. I feel like this is the first of many that I will write over the next year.

Love always,

The first week of being single

Because everyone loves juicy gossip.

2016 has officially roundhouse-kicked my butt. You’d think things can’t get any worse than the recent Presidential elections, chaos in Syria, the whole Marcos debacle, losing a loved one… then comes life proving you wrong and reminding you that you are not never in control.

And even if I’m a pretty optimistic person (at least, I’d like to think so), this was a blow unlike other blows. When you separate from someone you’ve put alot of time and effort and love in to, the world becomes a glassy version of what reality is. It’s like stepping into that other world they keep talking about in Stranger Things, it’s familiar but not at the same time. That’s where I’ve been living for the past week, somewhere that looks like my day-to-day life minus all the colors.

Continue reading “The first week of being single”

Life in VR Recap (my time working at Vania Romoff Inc.)

life in VR recap

Disclaimer: long post ahead.

I never talk about my day job; I guess I’m just a private-person like that. But since August 2015, I’ve been working at Vania Romoff Inc. which ended this week.

And before you ask: No, there is no vacancy at Vania Romoff Inc.! I already found and trained a perfectly capable replacement to take over my duties. But if you are interested in applying, you can send your resume to info@vaniaromoff.ph so that you can get an email if in case something opens up.

Continue reading “Life in VR Recap (my time working at Vania Romoff Inc.)”

Body update

Processed with VSCO with c2 preset

 

I’m not where I want to be at this point.

I’m still travelling, struggling, with the extra baggage

from the year before.

But everyday I am thankful

to be awake, alive, and going somewhere.

The journey is hard and the end is still at a distance

that I can’t touch no matter how hard I try to reach for it.

But everyday I am thankful

Even if the progress is minimal,

progress is still progress.

 

On birthdays and self love

Processed with VSCOcam with b4 presetbirthday

Day 42/366 thoughts

Happy birthday Jamie!

I know you hate selfies but as I was preparing this post, I thought that posting these old selfies you took 2 years ago would make it extra special. I know you hate them but remember when you thought that the lighting was perfect and the wind effect just made everything extra glorious that day? These photos sat quietly in your computer for 24 months; it’s time to share them with the world wide web.

Continue reading “On birthdays and self love”

How I’m planning to spend today

000022.JPG

  1. Finally finish The Unbearable Lightness of Being
  2. Skip work
  3. Do quiet things in quiet places
  4. Paint
  5. Eat
  6. Sleep
  7. Tell everybody that I have no age/I don’t grow old anymore/my age is X.

 

*Photo taken in Don Salvador Benedicto, Bacolod City with my Ricoh XR 500.