On the struggle

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Day 107/366 thoughts

Stop kidding yourself. No matter how many lies you make up about the kind of life you live or the kind of person you are, the web that you’ve woven will unravel and reveal the ultimate truth: that you’re a sham.

To live authentic is the ultimate struggle in this 21st century, self-entitled, millennial world.

On birthdays and self love

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Day 42/366 thoughts

Happy birthday Jamie!

I know you hate selfies but as I was preparing this post, I thought that posting these old selfies you took 2 years ago would make it extra special. I know you hate them but remember when you thought that the lighting was perfect and the wind effect just made everything extra glorious that day? These photos sat quietly in your computer for 24 months; it’s time to share them with the world wide web.

Continue reading “On birthdays and self love”

On my first love

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Day 19/366 thoughts

She’s right, of course. Every word is true.

It’s just not the whole truth. She doesn’t mention how you looked at me in the lunchroom that first day. Or how you blushed when your best friend, Kevin, said, “Why him?” and I tweaked your earlobe and replied, “Because he’s cute.” Or how nice you were to my rat even though you were terrified. Or how proud you were of me when I won the speech contest in Phoenix. Or how-I don’t know, how do you explain it?-how we just fit together.

Ok, so you’re not perfect. Who is?

Sure, Susan makes sense. But my heart doesn’t care about sense. My heart never says” Why? Only: Who?

Excerpt from Love, Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli

Global Mala Project 2015

global mala 2015

Going to the Global Mala Project has been a mini tradition for me and my best friend, Angel. Our first year was back in 2013, months after we started learning yoga together back in Bacolod (see here). We were so excited and I made sure that we stuck to our agreed schedule of classes. This year, we decided to return to the Global Mala Project as volunteers. We got to meet and talk to other volunteers/yogis as well as attend classes FOR FREE (which by the way was the best part). Angela and I took the morning shift so by 1pm, we were already on our mats.

We attended a total of 3 classes and 1 talk. My favorite class would have to be Gateway to Freedom: Core Awakening Flow Yoga by Christi Christensen. Not only was her personality infectious but what she was teaching us was exactly what I needed. To be honest, when she was repeating over and over again that we should let go and love ourselves, I started to tear up. I had a hard time blinking back the tears; good thing that I was sweating so much so nobody could tell if they were actual tears or my sweat.

These photos are not arranged in order of events and are a mix of when I was volunteering and photos I took before and after classes begun. Excuse the selfies, most of those were Angela’s idea.

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I know I mentioned somewhere  that I haven’t had a proper workout since the start of my graduation collection. That’s roughly a year of being stressed/busy/lazy bum. I enrolled in a gym last August to help get myself back in shape. I have a personal trainer named Spike who bugs me almost everyday to work out so that’s really been helping me out. I have gained a total of 30 pounds since I stopped working out. So you can just imagine the struggle of taking classes one after another during Global Mala. Honestly, I had only taken two Flow classes (after x number of months) the week prior to GMP so my body was DEFINITELY not prepared for the physical strain.

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Photo by my fellow volunteer, Kath

IMG_5964This year, I had a lot of time to reflect on my current situation and how bottled up I’ve become. I am honestly not the type to keep things to myself but during Christi’s class, I couldn’t help but feel lousy. It was like she knew what I was unconsciously going through and her energy just woke up something inside of me. I still can’t explain what exactly happened in that flow class but from it, I know that I have to cut myself some slack and relearn everything all over again.

So since GMP, I’ve slowly shifted to a Pescatarian diet, gone to yoga more than once this week and work out at least once a week. I’m trying to not harbor a lot of negativity during the day and I am slowly letting go of my worries and fears for the future. I try as much as possible to journal everyday too, a habit that I’ve let go off because of an insecurity.

I still have a long way to go but this has been the most peaceful my mind has been for months now. I’m just trying to go back to going with the flow.

August 3-7-2015 Photo Dump + Update

Weeks ago, I made a blog post about how I was experiencing a rut in my life. I can’t begin to explain how things definitely took a turn for the better after that post. I really felt the power of sending out thoughts into the universe and I don’t know where to begin! I will attempt to briefly explain some of the events that took place over the last 5 days with matching visual aids (of course).

Processed with VSCOcam with hb1 presetI received an email last Thursday (July 30) from a styling assistant from _________ Magazine, asking me if I was interested in doing a look for one of their October editorials. What great timing this was because prior to receiving the email, I was just saying that I needed to get more features/exposure for my portfolio. Even though Preview only gave me a week to make the outfit, I still said yes. You can see my design journey for this project and more here. Won’t go into details about the photo (except for the fact that the quilt was a BITCH to make!) since it pretty much speaks for itself. 🙂
Processed with VSCOcam with hb1 presetLast Tuesday, I headed over to San Juan for an internship/future job interview with an Art Gallery called Secret Fresh. I won’t expound on this but I did get to hang out at Starbucks Tomas Morato before my interview and to my surprise, a barista who I used to be close to (Hi Treb!) was at that branch! We caught up for a bit before I left for the interview. 

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After the interview with Secret Fresh, I went next door to Lunch Box where I had a hearty lunch. I couldn’t help but snap some photos of this place because it is goals and I was alone (lol).

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What I had for lunch: Roast Chicken with Mashed Potatoes and Veggies. YUM YUM YUM!
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Really nice set up. Check out the handwritten menus!

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The current book I’m reading. I’m a real sucker for Self-Help books and books that are just P-R-E-T-T-Y so when I stumbled upon this beauty, I just HAD to have it! I bought a copy for myself and for Sandi (birthday gift). I got to read the introduction while I was queuing to pay and it sounds really promising. What better way to get out of a rut, am I right?

I’m currently 1/4 through this book and so far so good. It’s visually pleasing and the text is straight to the point. I always find that the best Self-help books are the ones that tell you the honest truth in the most direct way possible. The reality checks they give are eye-openers and usually inspire me to act straight away.

Processed with VSCOcam with hb1 presetI still have a TON of unused squares left so I made a laptop sleeve for Annie and a book cover for myself. I noticed that my copy of “Show Your Work” was a bit damaged whilst it was in my everyday bag and I certainly didn’t want a repeat of that with my new pretty book. I really liked how these DIY projects turned out. It was actually pretty easy to make since the operations are just sewing straight lines and matching edges. Let me know if you want me to do a detailed post about how to make these though. 🙂

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I went to another job interview this week! Never did I think that I would have the opportunity to have options. But more on this another day though but the future is definitely bright!

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Furry hood. The fur is faux though so nothing to worry about; no animals were harmed. This is a sneak peek of my look for ________! Can you guess what my inspiration/s is/are? HEH HEH.

Man, after all those weeks… months.. of waiting and waiting and waiting for something to happen, all the opportunities come knocking during the same week. August is definitely looking up for me and I really hope that this good luck streak lasts for as long as possible.